What I learned by answering like one—and then answering as myself.
If the internet has a favorite personality accusation, it’s narcissist.
It’s practically a dating app default. But what does it actually mean?
- Is it just being self-involved?
- Is it a diagnosis or a spectrum?
- And how many people really fit the clinical definition?
So I decided to find out—for real.
🧠 Narcissism: Not Just About Mirrors
The term comes from Narcissus, a character in Greek mythology who fell in love with his own reflection. It’s become shorthand for self-absorption, but narcissism is more about emotional manipulation, lack of empathy, and fragile ego than it is about selfies.
🧪 I Took the Quiz—Two Ways
The quiz I used was the [Psychology Today Narcissism Test]. And I tried something a little unorthodox:
First, I answered like a narcissist.
Overconfident. No humility. No empathy. Pure “main character energy.”
Then I answered honestly.
Unlike the Karen quiz, it wasn’t as obvious what the “Narcissistic answer” was. It was obvious what the totally entitled asshole answer was, which was always one of the five choices so I took the quiz and picked those answers too. I will share results under both below.
Take the quiz here – 👉 Psychology Today Narcissism Test
Here’s what the result said (when I answered honestly):
📊 “In the middle.”
The results suggested I may sometimes be self-aggrandizing, egotistical, or manipulative—especially under stress. It also pointed out that I may struggle at times with empathy, humility, or having a realistic perspective of myself and others.
I appreciated the nuance.
It wasn’t condemning—it was revealing.
🧠 What This Really Means
Most of us have narcissistic traits—especially when we feel threatened or insecure. But that doesn’t mean we have narcissistic personality disorder (which is a clinical diagnosis and much more severe).
This quiz is a starting point—not a verdict.
🧘♀️ What to Ask Yourself Instead
- Do I listen with the intent to understand—or to redirect?
- Can I accept criticism without spiraling or deflecting?
- Do I genuinely celebrate others’ wins—or feel secretly threatened?
If you’re asking these questions—you’re probably not the narcissist.
